I guess it is a blogger trend to look back at 2013, what has
been achieved, what has held us back and what we’ve enjoyed- both on the blog
and in life. 2013 has been a year of change for me, and coping with these
changes hasn’t always been the easiest.
I’ve briefly touched on my anxiety on the blog before, it’s
something I don’t really like talking about in person, and in some ways it’s a
part of me I have learnt to dislike, but this year I’ve just had to learn to
cope with it and it’s something that I will probably develop into 2014
(hopefully I’ll get better at the coping too!) The hardest thing for me in many
ways is having to choose between going out and knowing my anxiety will come on,
or staying in and missing out on a social life. Somehow I think I’ve maintained
a good balance of that this year, sometimes even going out feeling awful, which
is difficult, but I wouldn’t have done it without the support of my friends and
family. I hate telling my friends that I’m choosing to stay in this time,
because in my head I’m dying to go out and have fun with them, but know that it
will most probably have a negative effect on my health. So, I guess that’s been
my negative of 2013 but also my new aim of 2014… to continue learning to deal
with it, as evidently it is going to be something that I’ll live with, as I’m
sure many other people have too.
So what have I achieved? Well as I said it’s been a year of
change, and I made the decision to leave school. I completed my AS levels achieving
a C, two D’s and an E and decided that it was time to move on and so I started
a health and social care course which I am loving… but it doesn’t come without
the hard work obviously! Don’t get me wrong, I miss my friends like crazy but I
still see them from time to time which are lovely. I’ve also been through a lot
with my friends this year….some friendships have got stronger, and some friends
I’ve lost, but the true friends have kept strong in my heart and I’m so
thankful to them for that. My family are also obviously a great support system
to me; annoyingly they always know when something’s wrong so there’s no room
for bottling things in! On a slightly odd note… I’ve achieved growing every
inch of style out of my hair… no longer is there signs of fringes or layers, so
I’m starting a fresh on a blank canvas. This summer was an amazing summer, we
actually got some sun! I went to Norfolk with my folks and got to look around
some old houses included Sandringham (yes I know- I am slightly nerdy). People
may disagree with this one, but I sort of think I’ve matured this year too,
through all of the problems and issues and moving schools I think it’s made me
a little bit stronger, even if it is just that little bit! I’ve also come to
accept that I may actually enjoy going to Derbyshire to walk… the tragedy of
it all!!!
I’m not going to sit here at my kitchen table and lie… I
have not enjoyed every moment of 2013. There were some times where I have just sat
there in tears ready to give up on whatever it is I was fed up of, but I’d like
to believe that the good parts always outshine the bits that get me down. I
think the bits I’ve enjoyed go from silly little bits, to bits that are
obviously important to me. For example, I seem to find comfort in deciding on
an outfit (yep, that’s the kind of thing that makes me smile) but then I also
find comfort in sitting with my friends either at the kitchen table or in the
living room just having a good old gossip about people, life events, silly
stuff… I think there’s been a few in depth Doctor Who conversations. Other
highlights are things like going to music concerts, there’s nothing better to
sooth the soul then a good bit of music, and my iPod knows the extent of my
music listening.
Which brings me to 2014…. The year of Wilderness Festival
(oh yes, here I come) and my friends leaving for University (not one to be
looked forward too)… but who knows what else it will bring along the way!
I’ll leave you with some of my favourites of the year:
Films: PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER (seriously…amazing…the
book too….)
TV shows: Doctor Who (oooOOOooooo) New Girl, and seriously
looking forward to the return of Sherlock.
Music: Of Monsters and Men, Haim, Passion Pit, The Paper
Kites, The Lumineers… this year has so been my year for music!
Drink: This may be slightly silly… but warm elderflower….it’s
delish and now I have a pretty flask to take it to school with me!
I hope that you had a great 2013 and that this year will be
even better. And remember, everybody has bad bits, but it just helps make us
into who we are and that is pretty cool.
Keep Dreaming xoxo
